JACK Why, on earth do you say that? Health is the primary duty of life. It is a great truth. I want to tell you the rules. If it did, it would prove a serious danger to the upper classes, and probably lead to acts of violence in Grosvenor Square.
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ALG Got nice neighbours in your part of Shropshire? JACK Perfectly horrid! Never speak to one of them. ALG How immensely you must amuse them!
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JACK Eh? Yes, of course. Sligo dating all these cups? Why cucumber sandwiches? Why such reckless extravagance in one so young? Who is coming to tea? ALG Oh! JACK How perfectly delightful!
ALG My dear fellow, the way you flirt with Gwendolen is perfectly disgraceful. It is almost as bad as the way Gwendolen flirts with you.
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I have come up to town expressly propose to her. ALG I thought you had come up for pleasure?
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JACK How utterly unromantic you are! It is very romantic to be in love. But there is nothing romantic about a definite proposal. Why, one may be accepted. One usually is, I believe.
Then the excitement is all over. The very essence of romance is uncertainty. The Divorce Court was specially invented for people whose memories are so curiously constituted. Divorces are made in Heaven- [Jack puts out his hand to take a sandwich. Algernon at once interferes.
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They are ordered specially for Aunt Augusta. ALG That is quite a different matter. She is my aunt. The bread and butter is for Gwendolen.
Gwendolen is devoted to bread and butter.
JACK [Advancing to table and helping himself. ALG Well, my dear fellow, you need not eat as if you were going to eat it all. You behave as if you were married to her already.
JACK Why, on earth do you say that? ALG Well, in the first place girls never marry the men they flirt with. JACK Oh, that is nonsense!
It is a great truth. It accounts for the extraordinary number of bachelors that one sees all over the place.
JACK Sligo dating consent! ALG My dear fellow, Gwendolen is my first cousin. And before I allow you to marry her, you will have to clear up the whole question of Weybridge viteza dating. What on earth do you mean?
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What do you mean, Algy, by Cecily? Worthing left in the smokingroom the last time he dined here. LANE Yes, sir. I wish to goodness you had let me know.
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I have been writing frantic letters to Scotland Yard about it. I was very nearly offering sligo dating large reward.
ALG Well, I wish you would offer one. I happen to be more than usually hard up. JACK There is no good offering a large reward now that the thing is found.
Algernon takes it at once. Lane goes out. It is a very ungentlemanly thing to read a private cigarette case. I simply want my cigarette case back. ALG Your aunt! JACK Yes. Charming old lady she is, too.
Lives at Tunbridge Wells.